Honestly, this hasn’t been the best day. I am struggling to get back into the swing of things and I am feeling pretty sad about being away from my family again after having such a great visit with them. I am happy to report that I managed to keep the eating and exercise much more in line today, but it definitely feels like I am entering a fake-it-until-I-make-it phase. I just am not doing great.
I have been trying to sort through the last couple of days so that I can accurately record what led to such a large gain over just a weekend away, but I think I need to give myself a bit longer to really wrap my head around all of it. This is the first time I have strayed drastically from my plan – I know there have been bouts here and there, but they were just hours of difficulty, not days of blatant backsliding – so I am really examining what went on. It’s just hard to put it into words right now.
I have filled in my missing food and exercise lists for the past three days. As pathetic as they are, at least I kept track of everything still. I am nothing, if not honest.
My husband says this is just proof that I am human – that I have spent the last nine months moving forward with a robotic like drive and that this was bound to happen. He reminded me that it is okay to slip up.
He fully believes that I will be back to my normal healthy living right away. I wish I had his confidence. Things feel really hard at this moment. But I guess that’s all I have to get through just now: this moment… and then the next one… and the next…
FOOD & BEVERAGES:
- 4 glasses of water
- 1 pear
- 2 cups celery with light peanut butter
- 1 large golden delicious apple
- 1 mug coconut steamed soy milk
- 8 pieces of a California sushi roll with soy sauce
- 1 smoky hot dog on a sesame hot dog bun with cheese, fat free Miracle Whip, mustard, and relish
- 3/4 cup fat free strawberry yogurt with 1 cup fruit, seed, and nut granola
- 1 caramel rice cake
- 1 mug decaffeinated tea with milk
- 5 whole wheat crackers with cheese
- 1 hour and 15 minutes of rowing a dragon boat