Thursday, February 25, 2010

Running In Circles

My husband has gotten it into his head that come what may he will be finishing the C25K program with me. Now, I really appreciate the support and all – and I certainly am not opposed to seeing my darling man become a fitter version of himself – but he HATES running.

He loathes jogging around that track.

He despises it.

He would probably rather cover the more delicate parts of his anatomy with honey and then venture too close to a gathering of fire ants than keep on doing the program.

Yet, he insists on continuing.

I do not understand it and, quite frankly, I don’t really feel like he has offered any reasonable explanation for why he even wants to continue. Apart from a raging desire to complete the program for the sake of completing it, he hasn’t offered any real insight into why he is so determined to finish what he started.

I get why I am doing it. I can even easily comprehend why he began it with me. But every single time we go to the track to do our approximately half hour long session I can sense the tension in him before we start. It is easy to note his displeasure while he is in the middle of the jogging and equally simple to see the hatred for the activity practically radiating off of him once we are done. Truly, it is that bad!

Why does he keep at it?!

I love my husband deeply and, in the spirit of the amazing communication that we share, have already had several conversations with him about this. It isn’t actually affecting my time at the track at all – otherwise I might have a genuine reason to beg him to stop – but I can see how much he dislikes it and so I keep offering him solutions. I’ve suggested that he slow his pace to match mine, just walk while I jog, quit altogether, and so on. He won’t hear of it.

Normally, I can figure out the reasons behind pretty much every one of the man’s behaviours; I am generally very in tune with his thoughts and I just get why he does the things he does. But I can’t seem to make sense of this. He asked me last night, “Do you have to understand it?”

Good question.

Maybe there is a lesson here. Perhaps I should spend a little less time questioning his journey and put a bit more effort into supporting the one person who has been there for me through every single step of my own. This is an opportunity to show the man I love more than anything that I can accept him and his decisions in the same unconditional way that he does me and mine. I have a chance to tell my husband how amazing I think he is by not speaking a word.

He will keep running. I guarantee it. His determination will keep him going and his example will encourage me to do the same, just as my own energy will renew me and him when the need arises. He and I may travel through this life together in a variety of fashions – walking, jogging, running, sprinting, hopping, skipping, crawling, strolling, and dancing – but we will forever do so side by side and hand in hand.

- 10 glasses of water
- 1 burger on a thin bun with light cheese, spinach, onion, mushroom, fat free Miracle Whip, mustard, and relish
- 1 bite of a homemade cranberry cinnamon granola bar
- 1 homemade chocolate and peanut butter granola bar
- 3 cups spinach salad with croutons, dried cranberries, orange pepper, mushroom, and calorie-wise Greek feta and oregano dressing
- 1 pear
- 1 sandwich on whole wheat bread with light peanut butter and light strawberry jam
- 1/2 golden delicious apple with cinnamon

- 35 minute step workout video
- 30 minutes of the C25K program (Day 2 of Week 4)


  1. oh oh oh I can relate to this more than you know.
    and THATS all Im sharing on a public forum (wink)


  2. Such a sweet hubby! Why ask why?

  3. Yeah, I say leave it alone. If he wants to run for his own reasons that he can't seem to explain...then let him run!!! And be THANKFUL that you have a partner so willing to participate in a healthy lifestyle. Not all of us are even a fraction of being that blessed. :)

  4. I concur - let him do it. He may actually, secretly, enjoy it and can see the profit of doing it with you. Think of how awesome it'll be after he has finished the 5k and is waiting for you to finish as well.....(I only say waiting b/c you told him to slow down).

    As a man, sometimes we feel that we lose control of even the smaller things in life (why we feel this way sometimes - idk) and we need to be able to focus on the things that we can control, even if we despise, loath, and hate it. Let him have it. :)

  5. Good for him to be so supportive. I know it makes you proud. And lots of luck to you both on the C25K program, it's a great program to learn how to run.

  6. Don't question. Be happy that he is there with you. It sounds as though you are truly deeply in love with this man. Be ever so grateful for something so special. He obviously has his own reasons. Many of us will never know that sort of support from our spouses/partners. Good luck to you both.

  7. I understand where you're coming from. I'm also learning that there are some things I have to just stay quiet about...though I'll never understand why it's being looked at a certain way.

    You have a great attitude towards your marriage and making it work for the long term. Good for you!

  8. Who knows? Trying to prove something to himself sounds like to simple of a theory. (((shrugging)))

    One of my colleagues runs but doesn't like it but he feels like he should be doing something...

  9. It sounds like he's doing it for you.

    I can't tell you not to ask why, because I must know everything, myself. If my husband asked me the question, "Do you need to understand?" my answer would be a simple and straightforward "yes."

  10. I would LOVE to have a built-in exercise buddy! :)

  11. Oh, btw, my kids LOVE your sidebar photos...they think it is sooo cool! We scanned down them fast and it's like a flip book! They told me..."Mom, you just need to keep exercising and you can do it too!"

    Out of the mouth of babes pours forth wisdom. :)

  12. Afraid that if he gives up you will?
    Afraid that you can do it and he struggles?
    Wont be beaten by a
    Wont be beaten fullstop?
    Needs to challenge himself?
    Would feel like a wuss if he opted out?
    Hates the journey loves the results?
    Will go faster than you cos its a boy/girl thing?
    Started to support you, realises he needs it?
    Failing to finish is not an option?

    Complex things human doings...but he is right -- do you need to understand? Does he question why you are doing what you are doing when you struggle to lose weight? Did he accept you as you were? Accept that he hates it - but is doing it anyway ~ just because he can?



  13. Hi 266! I'm new to your blog (Linda at dive weigh suggested I check it out) and I have already gained a wonderful insight from you! I'm always questioning my husband's way of thinking, doing, etc... and if I can't understand it I often treat it like it's a silly waste of time. Not very loving, huh? Thanks for giving me the concept that "I don't need to understand it to accept it" to mull over in my mind. My husband will appreciate it! :) I enjoyed reading your posts and will return - I'm at if you ever want to visit! ~ Angie

  14. I know I am SO lucky to have him!

    Seth, thank you for a very insightful comment. I really appreciate the feedback.

    They Call Me Mommy, thank you for telling me about your kids; that made me smile and I have no doubt that they are right about you being able to do it too!

    Wonderful thoughts, BlueRaspberry... thanks!

  15. Wonderful relationship -you are blessed x