Sunday, August 1, 2010

Tit For Tat

I know that things have a way of evening out – that when you give something up you often receive something in return, that when one door closes another one opens, and so on. Such is life.

Regardless of this knowledge, I was sad when I realized that my rather generous bust line was quickly shrinking as I lost weight. I have always thought of myself as well-proportioned and I still do; as that one part of me has dropped in size so has everything else and I know that I am lucky to be able to say that. Nevertheless, my large chest was something that I had somehow grown strangely proud of in my obese state, and it was with grim downward glances that I watched that area get smaller and smaller over these past eleven and a half months. I think that many bigger women develop an attachment to their curves, and I was certainly one with such adoration for the more voluptuous parts of my figure.

But here’s where I recognize that, yet again, life has a way of providing balance. Now… I just don’t miss them like I thought I would. There are so many positives which I have gained from having smaller band and cups sizes that I don’t often think anymore about the few things I have lost.

I can go bra shopping… anywhere! I went on such an outing with a good friend just last week and I was able to try on just about everything that I wanted. I have never been able to do that! And they were pretty too! I didn’t have to limit myself to a tiny selection from a specialty shop or the plus-sized options in a department store because that was all that would fit me. I was able to walk amongst rows and rows of brassieres and pick and choose whatever colour, whatever style, and whatever beautiful details I wanted. That felt so great! And as an added bonus, like I mentioned, I was able to do all of that with someone. Again, I would never have been able to do something like that in the past, but now I feel like I am no longer missing out on that specific type of bonding that happens when friends go shopping together!

I know I wrote a short while ago that I am thrilled to finally be able to wear under wire again as opposed to just the sports bras I was donning for far too long. On top of that, I used to feel like they were a great weight, which I am sure they actually were. There were many times that I was seated when I felt as though my breasts sat heavily on top of my stomach. And they often weighed so greatly over my lungs that I am fairly certain that it was to the impediment of my breathing. When I laid down to sleep, I even had to shift around quite a bit to avoid a choking sensation, such was the mass of flesh beneath my neck.

So while I do occasionally miss the satisfaction that somehow accompanied having a generous bust, and although a part of my identity as a full-figured woman is now behind me, I know I have given up just as many negatives as positives. I am sure that what I have gained equals or exceeds that which I have lost. And I am confident that regardless of what the tag on my bra says that I will always be someone who appreciates the way that things even out in the end.

8 comments:

  1. yeah, I lost some boobage.
    But it's all even. If you think about it..if we had kept our exceptionally large bosoms, we would look a bit strange and top heavy. So no worries.

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  2. I also lost my boobs. I have gone from an hour glass shape to a pear shape. I'm hoping that i will even up again!

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  3. Women with a small or average bust line look so much better in blouses ... no gaping holes. Dropping inches in the band size means there must be less back flesh. It's all good.

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  4. I'm a big fan of my D's. Not too big, not too small. Going to be really sad if they go away! :-(

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  5. Oh I don't think I will ever be sorry they are gone. I just hate big boobs. It will be nice when "some" people realize that I have eyes. When I get thin, I'm having a boob job! Can't wait to get smaller bra's instead of the ones I get now. When I lay the bra down, it looks like 2 mountain tops! Geez! Hugs to you!

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  6. That's really nice that you're able to fit into any dept store bra...I bet its cheaper too.

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  7. I'm in the process of missing my boobs as well, they've been apart of me, one of the few things on a ig girl one would complain about. But they are shrink with the rest of me, not cool when they shrank beofre my stomach though :) But it's all good.

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  8. The bonding that happens when women speak frankly about their bodies is so refreshing! Thanks for all the remarks!!! :)

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